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Marriage takes a lot of effort, time, and compromise to work and last.
For married couples, going to counseling or therapy together can help unearth issues in the relationships and find ways to deal with them.
Although marriage counseling is now offered online, there are still many couples around the country who don’t have easy access to this service for various reasons.
The best alternative is marriage books that can point couples to the best solutions to their marital problems. They can bring spouses closer together and make their relationships stronger.
Today, we’re sharing 11 of the best marriage books ever written. These are books meant to help couples develop stronger relationships.
Read on to see what’s in the collection.
1. The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
First on the list is Gary Chapman’s best seller, The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts.
Sure, falling in love is easy and exhilarating, but how does a couple stay in love after years of marriage?
Chapman’s book offers practical and eye-opening advice for couples whose marriage goal is to make their relationship work and last. It helps couples understand how they express love for each other—their love languages—and how they can strengthen their relationships through this awareness.
2. The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman and Nan Silver
What do couples need to make their marriages work?
In The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert, John Gottman introduces us to seven principles that, according to him, are necessary to make marriages work and last.
With years of experience working with couples, Gottman is considered one of the leading experts in marriage counseling. This book is praised for how it has helped a lot of couples achieve the highest potential in their relationships.
3. Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson
You may have heard of Emotionally Focused Therapy. This concept was introduced by Dr. Sue Johnson in Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love. It helps us understand how we form attachments with people and how this affects us on an emotional level.
In this book, Dr. Johnson teaches us about the importance of maintaining connection with your partner and how to preserve this bond.
This book is a great help for those who are starting to feel a disconnect with their significant others and want to bring back the spark.
4. The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm
This classic book was written more than 50 years ago, but is still highly recommended for couples looking to better understand the nature of love.
People often understand love only in its romantic form, but Fromm shows readers that experiencing love in its different forms can be a life-changing experience.
This excerpt from the book is as relevant now as when the book was first published:
“Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an ordination of character which determines the relatedness of the person to the whole world as a whole, not toward one object of love.” – Erich Fromm
Understanding the true nature of love allows us to have a more mature outlook in all our relationships.
5. How to Be an Adult in Relationships by David Richo
Speaking of maturity, in How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving, David Richo shares with us the basis for mature love.
The book provides a refreshing view about love. It starts with becoming more mindful and authentic as a person.
This mindful way of loving has five hallmarks that Richo shares with readers:
Richo’s goal for readers is not only to achieve mature love, but also to transform and achieve their highest potential.
6. The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz
Don Miguel Ruiz authored several books, including The Four Agreements, where he offered four life-changing tips that transform you from someone who is filled with negativity into a person radiating with positivity.
The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship is ideal for those who are in relationships and want to try ways of strengthening the bonds with their partners.
One key takeaway from the book is that we humans often search for love from external sources. We forget that the love that we are looking for is already within us.
7. Mindful Relationship Habits by S.J. Scott and Barrie Davenport
For many people, once they’re married, it is often too easy to take the one they love for granted.
Also, life tends to get in the way: career, children, bills, etc. There’s no time to spend with each other like they used to early in the relationship.
Then you wonder “what happened to the spark?”
Mindful Relationship Habits: 25 Practices for Couples to Enhance Intimacy, Nurture Closeness, and Grow a Deeper Connection provides practical and actionable solutions that help reignite the spark between spouses.
It begins with creating mindful habits that nurture a marriage and help it thrive despite everything else in life that demands the couple’s attention.
8. Eight Dates by John and Julie Gottman
In Eight Dates: Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, John and Julie Gottman share ways for spouses to reconnect and get to know each other more deeply.
The book provides step-by-step guides to eight fun, eye-opening dates. Each date is focused on a contentious issue among many couples: sex, trust, money, conflict, adventure, dreams, spirituality, and family.
Guide questions, prompts, and interactive activities are provided in the book. These prompts are designed to get spouses talking with each other (and help them continue talking). The end result is that the couple builds a stronger and more joyful relationship.
9. Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller
Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – And Keep – Love provides readers with a roadmap for establishing stronger and healthier relationships with other people.
It helps you discover and understand adult attachment.
In the book, Levine and Heller share the fact that humans behave in three different ways when they are in relationships.
These behavioral tendencies include being:
10. Healthy Relationships byRachel Chapman
Healthy Relationships: Overcome Anxiety, Couple Conflicts, Insecurity and Depression Without Therapy. Stop Jealousy and Negative Thinking. Learn How to Have a Happy Relationship With Anyone promises to help improve your relationship by teaching you how to nurture love and intimacy.
Chapman states that many people have difficulty interacting with others, especially in relationships, due to shyness or a poor family environment. With this book, readers will:
The actionable suggestions in this book are powerful tools for deepening the relationship with your partner.
11. After the Affair by Janis Abrahms Spring
According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, 15% of women and 25% of men experienced infidelity while in a long-term relationship.
While most books on healing after infidelity speak only to the aggrieved partner, After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful is for both the partner hurt by the affair and the partner who committed the infidelity.
This book can trigger raw emotions for couples. But although the process of healing is uncomfortable, it helps address the crisis in the marriage and offers proven strategies to help rebuild the relationship.
Final Thoughts on the Best Marriage Books
The best marriage books are those that help strengthen a couple’s relationship.
But reading them does not necessarily mean that your marriage is on the rocks.
In fact, reading these books shows your willingness to understand your spouse, develop a more loving relationship, and grow as a married couple.
Even if you are considering going into marriage counseling or therapy, these books can still be of great help.
Finally, if you need more resources on marriage or relationships, you can head over to any of the articles below: